Self Check Mechanism.

Mood : Depressed. Dir en grey – The Final video looped on the background.

To think that i’m so fragile. Sigh. I’m doubting myself. “What if I never actually knew her, would she be happy?”, “What if we never met at that website, would we still have the chance to meet each other?”, “If I found someone else, would I be happy?” so i think over and over again on such random things all day long.  Why does it keeps popping inside my head? Why i’m thinking this anyway? Maybe god have a plan i think myself alone, to this boy who never actually good enough to deserve it. I’m still wondering if i can be successful in life, having thought of this, i said “Yes, but i have to sacrifice more to get more” Is it true? Is what i’m doing is right? Is what i’ve said is true? What if it breaks someone’s heart? What if it will make u being hated more? What if you will be left alone just like before u get to standard 4? Ah.. god, why i’m thinking of this now?

PS: Why i’m writing this?