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Dream Theater – Wither

Let it out, let it out
Feel the empty Space
So insecure find the words and let it out
Staring down, staring down
Nothing comes to mind
Find the place turn the water into wine

But I feel I’m getting nowhere
And I’ll never see the end

So I wither
And render myself helpless
I give in and everything is clear
I breakdown
And let the story guide me

Turn it on
Turn it on
Let the feelings flow
Close your eyes
See the ones you used to know

Open up open up
Don’t struggle to relate
Lure it out
Help the memory escape
Still transparentness consumes me
And I feel like giving up

So I wither
And render myself helpless
I give in
And everything is clear
I breakdown
And let the story guide me

I wither
And give myself away

Light reflections on the page
The worlds want to create

I drown in hesitation
My words come crashing down
And all my best creations
Burning to the ground

The thought of starting over
Leaves me paralyzed
Tear it out again
Another one that got away

I wither
And render myself helpless
I give in
And everything is clear

I wither
And render myself helpless
I give in
And everything is clear
I breakdown
And let the story guide me
I wither
And give myself away

Light reflections on the page
The worlds want to create
The worlds which you create

Let it out let it out….

Vroom…

WARNING : HUGE LOAD OF UNSTRUCTURED TEXT, MAY INDUCE TLDR; SYMPTOMS. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

Now let’s see..

9 April 2010. Friday.

Me, my sis, aunt and uncle went to Kelantan on 9hb for my second cousin, Azaad and Tata’s wedding (Kak Tata’s side) which happens on the next day. Arrived Kelantan around 4 PM on that day and stayed at Renaissance Hotel, unpacked our things and i went out by myself later to take a look on the city. It was refreshing. It’s been a while for me to venture north, and this actually the first time ever i have set foot on Kelantan. It’s just like any other places that i used to go within the country, with the exception of the food, market, people and apparently, their hot weather. Walked around for a little bit while buying newspaper from the news stand, and read it inside the hotel. Then i saw my uncle and aunt in the lobby and we head out to had an afternoon tea on a mamak stall. Funny thing is, the food there ain’t that UBER sweet like my pal used to told me, maybe because it’s a mamak stall, lul.

Head back in to the hotel, relaxed a little bit and prepare ourselves out to meet other family members who stayed in a different hotel than us to have dinner together. Finding the hotel was confusing, first of all, we’re depend a lot on the GPS, and we just knew the GPS hasn’t beet updated recently, so most of the directions were all wrong. It keeps popping out recalculating if we didn’t took the turn (it turns out the road already a one way road) and it’s annoying, /smack. So we basically have to guess our way out, and found out that the location ain’t that far at all. ;>_>.

So we gathered, went to the place (which basically in front of the hotel where the other family members staying), ordered the food and do random talks. Food came slow as there’s a lot of us, and when the food did arrives, it tasted bad. It tasted plain, and i for sure ‘who have great hate’ on plain tasted food, definitely didn’t like it. Later that time, Kak Aby and Syamim arrived, and i for once felt relieved. Basically i never talked much before they arrived, as i failed to initiate talking moment with the others. One, most of the familiar faces of the family were not there, Secondly, when they not there, I’ll be a listening ear. Third, I’ll make a bored face and the others will think that speaking to me is a bad idea (i guess?).

Talked to Syamim for a while to keep ourselves occupied, and Kak Aby as well regarding her new camera that she bought a week before. Oh take note that the one getting married is their oldest brother, which i forgot to mention early, /head-desk. Dinner was done, and we head out to their hotel and set up wifi settings on Syamim’s Blackberry and Netbook. I took the opportunity to update my facebook and keep track on work (i didn’t bring my laptop, as i didn’t know the place that i stayed actually provides a broadband service for free, oh lol). After done that, i headed to the floor’s lobby as Syamim went to sleep early, and stayed there listening (again, i’m so unsocial guy, >_>)  watching the others setting up the wedding gifts and other preparations. Soon after that, (around 2 am) we take our leave, heads back to our hotel and sleep.

10 April 2010. Saturday.

Woke up early in the morning, and i noticed that my body got stuck on the soft deliciously comfort bed. It keeps me from waking up, REAL BAD. Until my mom decided to punch me on the face, and shout “Adib, WAKE UP YOU LAZY ASS!” and of course, i woke up straight away from the bed and went to the bathroom, take a bath / brush my teeth and take great length to boot my brain up. But yet again, i’m the first one to get ready for the upcoming trip and headed to the hotel’s lobby first and i noticed that my aunt and uncle were already there. =/

When my mom and sis FINALLY came down, all of us headed out to the local food stall to get our breakfast and make haste to the hotel where my other family members staying in. When we arrived there, they’re still having their breakfast, so i take my time lingering in Syamim’s room, and proceed helping out by taking down the wedding gifts to the hotel’s lobby.

All of us had a briefing before heading out to the mosque, and it has been decided me, my mom and sis had to hold 3 of the wedding gifts on our lap, as there’s not many people brought their cars and the gifts are actually consist of DESTRUCTIBLE MATERIALS to begin with, so it had to be done this way. We moved out, following the  car in front of us, but midway, because of the fail car in front of us who basically never think of the people who were following their car, we had to find our way through the mess by activating the fail GPS module. To our surprise,  we arrived the location FIRST before the fail lead cars. LOL! So we head out from the car, putting the wedding gifts on the back of our car, and i get myself ready wearing Sampin + Songkok with the help of my mum on the sampin part, because i never wore a sampin before, lul. The mosque was majestically beautiful, the structural design on the mosque were based on a mixture of traditional chinese + arabic, which really suit the name of the mosque itself, ‘Beijing Mosque’. All of us start to heading in to the inner sanctum of  the mosque, while the bride and bridegroom prepare themselves for the Islamic wedding ceremony. I was greeted by the people in there, mistakenly thought as the bridegroom. /facepalm.

I tinkered around my sis’s camera while waiting the event to start. I walked around a little bit and headed out for a while, joining the adult men on their crusade to have a drink on the local restaurant not far from there while there’s still time to do so as the weather were outrageously hot. We didn’t take our time long, head back to the mosque soon after, and apparently the ceremony were about to start when we arrived there. Took some pictures here and there during the ceremony together with Kak Aby. I stopped taking pictures later on, as i noticed the memory card on the camera is full, so i stayed at the nearest spot that i could sit on while the ceremony progress further.

Now, let me get a sip of my tea before continuing this post… *slurp..* Now, where were we?

Oh yes.. the ceremony ended with the witnesses approved the wedding and Abg Azaad signing the official wedding paper. Hug moment begins, everyone had their happy faces and some even crying during that time. I too, almost shed a tear as i consider him as a big brother. When i was little, the only friends that i usually played with is either him or his younger brother Syamim, (since they’re basically live right next to my house. =) ) so yeah, i do have the instable emotion of shedding the tears of joy for him. I’m glad that he’s getting married now, after all this years he’s been trying to find the suitable women to join the family and share his passion, feelings, and thanks to Allah, his wish has been granted on that day.

*cough* Let’s end the cheesy comment of mine. So! After that event being finished with huge success, the time has come for us folks to cross the border, to Sungai Golok, Thailand for wedding reception on the bride side. The border crossing point is basically 45-50 minutes journey by car from the mosque, and the place is cramped with people, as there’s no proper station unlike Malaysian’s passport check point. The road was small, and so we had to take our chance parking at a side road there to get our passport chop by the thailand’s immigration officer. With the hot weather, it certainly is making me (or anyone) stink of sweat instantly. =/ With the passport check ins being dealt with, now we have to drive to the Bride’s house. Luckily this time the lead cars not leaving us behind and if they do, the gps that we have in the car doesn’t work in thailand, for some reason. =/  Took a while going through the zig zag road over there, which I particularly spotted a few soldiers here and there. which I’m guessing due to the upbringing in bangkok during that time. You know, the red shirt faction thing.

Not long after that little sight seeing, we arrived at the bride’s house. Parked the cars on the road that leads to the bride’s house and went straight to one of the houses there so the bridegroom may change to proper clothing matching the occasion.  Once the preparation were done, we started to head down to the bride’s house with the “kompang” as the bgm music.  I carried down one of the wedding gifts, passing it to the bride’s side and straight BAM! to the seat closest that i can find. I’m usually won’t get tired so easily, but then, due to the weather being SOOOO hot, it totally draining my stamina down to the critical level in a very short time. The food are great, by the way. Would love to taste it again if there’s a chance for me to do so! =3. The event progressed successfully, people ate, people sit by waiting for the food to be processed, and ate again, taking pictures,  and before we know it, it’s time for us to head back to Malaysia again (which is totally not that far) The tiny river is like at the back of the bride’s house. I can just swim back if i want to go back to Malaysia, LOL.

So yeah we head back to our hotel, rest a bit aka SLEEP, and then prepare for the after dinner on the same day. As usual, mom and sis sure took a while to get ready, so i ended up going down to the hotel lobby with my uncle and aunt, and we headed out to the dinner place.

- still drafting -

Abingdon Boys School – STEALTH-零号式JAP-

Shut off the lights, all the windows are closing
I’ll be safe here, keep on telling myself in bed

Made it this far, am I on the red list?
Everyday singing ’bout love, hanging on a thread

Never seems to end
A part of me wants to give in
A part of me won’t let me
The pride makes it difficult
This is who I am

(untamed)
I’m on my way to leave the days
(going to break the chain)
When hope was a stain, when I stood in the rain
(somewhere)
I’m on my way to start the days
(out there)
Where I will find my place, under the radar I’m reaching for the sky

It could be him, or the guys behind you
Traps and weapons, might be hiding under daylight

Boundaries are strong, and the going gets rough
Everyday singing ’bout love, tryna feel alright

Never seems to end
A part of me wants to give in
A part of me won’t let me
The pride makes it difficult
This is who I am

(untamed)
I’m on my way to leave the days
(going to break the chain)
When dream was a shame, when I stood in the rain
(somewhere)
I’m on my way to start the days
(out there)
Where I will face the change, illuminate the glow I have inside

On my way

DO NOT be dominated, DO NOT let ‘em take you away
SO WHAT if they’re in the way, for your mission is possible
DO WHAT you believe is right, DO WHAT you can do at a time
SO WHAT if they’re in the way, go tell ‘em that it’s your life

(untamed)
I’m on my way to leave the days
(going to break the chain)
When hope was a stain, when I stood in the rain
(somewhere)
I’m on my way to start the days
(out there)
Where I will find my place, under the radar I’m reaching for the sky

Along the way there is a place…
Somewhere out there waiting for me…
I’m gonna live out my life untamed

Credits : Abingdon Boys School and Source link of the lyrics at here

Nightwish – The Islander

Final Moment of GACC.

Games Anime Comic Circle, aka GACC has come to end this coming march.

Memories that can’t be erased or be forgotten for the rest of our (the committee) lives. It’s kinda sad that i started my blog after a long hiatus with two sad entries. Set that aside, as what have khurshid have said on his blog there, i decided to point out my views on this matter. During my University years where at the time there was like a bunch of clubs in the university, i decided to apply for member in emina. At first it was actually wanted to fill up my curriculum forms and do nothing as a lame sleeping member. But who knows, the more that i met the fellas and hang out with them during those course of time, the my affection grew bigger towards the club. To be honest, i never did take up any important positions in the club itself, nor actually volunteered to take up the important jobs. You see here my dear readers, i’m just a bastard that preferred to help indirectly rather than doing it directly. It’s a shame but that’s how my nature was during those time of years. I was quite a silent person, tying to join a circle that was filled with happiness and passion towards what we love most, Anime and Games.

At first, for the first time in my life, i’m enjoying my time there to my fullest. Starting from being just an observer in the circle, i started out voicing myself out. During those times, i got to say that i absolutely can’t speak english nor write in english pretty well as it’s actually not my first language and i was deep on Malay language. If i ever wanted to try to join them in a conversation, my brain will come at halt, like there’s a big boulder holding up the path. Kinda sad when each time i tried to speak in english, the more quiet i become. When i started out to at least speak up very well in english, i got to say that it comes from the involvement with this community. Seriously!

Every thursday i would relax in the CLC room taking my sweet break by watching the provided shows by the high committee. From there, i started looking for Manga and Anime to enjoy myself with during my free time. Through this new passion too, i ended up being a scanlator for 6 manga scanlation group. Franky-House, One Manga, JACgroup (I’m one of the pioneers), VIScans, Moarbadscans and lastly Whatever ( SHQ Scanlation group deeply involved in doing Gantz and D-Gray-man ). And the peak of all the times when i was in the club was actually participating in GACC. But now, it all comes to an end.

Even though there won’t be anymore GACC after this year. The spirit of GACC will always lit up within our very heart. No matter which jobs did you take in the future, how far are you from the circle, we’re always connected through a single line that was created by ourself. Notice that i didn’t actually tell you readers about GACC in this very post, and i think it’s kinda sad for me to type it out myself. Further reading can be done through Khurshid’s post on his blog which is again, here. Thank you Emina, and thank you GACC. It has been a wonderful experience, meeting new friends, sharing our knowledge (Anime, Manga, Audio / Video files passions), and finally for being a part of my life. To all of my friends which is in the circle even though we’re not related by blood, but I consider you all my important family members. We shall meet again in another time in another day.

May God bless us all, no matter where you guys / gals are. Amin.

PS : Everything that has a beginning, has an end.